I saw someone buy a bong tonight at San Diego (a chain store that's constantly going out of business for some reason, so you get lots of clearance sales). It amused me so much, buying paraphernalia designed, in most cases, to be used with substances which are apparently illegal because, apparently, they are capable of destroying this country and the morals of its upstanding, hardworking citizens and their white, heterosexual families.
Come on, people. You're never going to stop the evil scourge of drugs like that!
In fact, if drugs are that much of a plague upon our society, I think it's time to get serious. I mean, if we really want to stop illegal drugs from reaching the pure-as-the-driven-snow hands of our young, innocent, and oh-so-naive children (won't somebody think of them for once!) we'd better stop pretending that we can stop this ever-encroaching darkness with the kinds of weak penalties we afford. Ten years in prison is simply not enough for someone evil enough to sell a product to willing customers for an agreed upon price! We need real deterrents!
That's why I, here, now, am officially advocating the use of the restoration of the death penalty, and its application to some of the worst people in our society - drug users and their dealers!
These people are single-handedly responsible for 73.2% of the evil festering in Canadian communities, and it's time we started treating them accordingly. (They are also responsible for 90% of the puppy stranglings, and 50% of child molestations... whoops, sorry, that last one's the Catholic Church.) If we want to fight drugs, let's get serious!
(More on the drug war later...)